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Screw school pamphlets, unhelpful grief groups, and people saying “sorry for your loss.” It’s time to get real about grief. We’re in this together.

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I’m worried another family member might die
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Want to know what actual tears look like?
Want to know what actual tears look like?

Ever wonder what tears are made of? What they'd look like if they were magnified under a microscope?

Rose-Lynn Fisher did. That's why this artist created a book called The Topograpy of Tears, which is an investigation of tears, which are made up of proteins, minerals, hormones antibodies, and enzymes.

Rose-Lynn started the project in 2008, while she was experiencing grief. She wondered whether tears of joy would look the same as tears of sorrow. Would tears caused by cutting an onion look different? So Rose-Lynn collected her own tears as well as those from volunteers and then studied and photographed them under an optical standard light microscope. 

What did she learn about the looks of tears?

Tears look a lot like aerial views of land. Also, every tear she captured had it's own visual qualities or "signature." So even tears of grief look different from one another.

As Rose-Lynn put it, "It's as though each one of our tears carries a microscosm of the collective human experience, like one drop of an ocean."


"One Day" and dozens of tissues
"One Day" and dozens of tissues

"One Day" is based on a book by David Nicholls that was then turned into a 2011 movie (starring Anne Hathaway) and then recently was made into a Netflix series (what's next...a Broadway show?).

Anyway, the series is a romantic drama about Emma and Dexter, who meet in college and experience immediate sparks. But it's the end of the school year and their relationship doesn't get a chance to really take off.

Still, they do find their way back to each other, and the series follows their friendship (and screaming matches and romantic flings) over the next decade.

Without spoiling the story for you...grief shows up in a BIG way by the end, and we're telling you right now to have your tissue box(es) sitting right next to you because you'll need it.

What we appreciate is that the person grieving (trying so hard not to spoil the story right now) does such a good job of showing all the feels and how grief isn't just something that we just get over after a few months. It's messy and awful and sometimes beautiful and everything in between.

"Everybody Hurts"
"Everybody Hurts"

by Ann, age 13

I love the song "Everybody Hurts" by R.E.M., which was written to try to prevent more teens from dying by suicide. Even though this isn't specifically about grief, I think that the lyrics can be interpreted towards grief. I especially love these lines: 

When your day is long 
And the night, the night is yours alone 
When you're sure you've had enough 
Of this life, we'll hand on 
Don't let your self go 
Cause everybody cries 
Everybody hurts sometimes 

In my opinion I think these lyrics are saying that when you've had enough and think it will never get better, it's ok and normal to cry and express your emotions. For all of us who grieve, this is definitely true!

Why we still talk about them
Why we still talk about them

We love this sentiment written by @empowered_through_grief:

"I talk about him because I am the 

memory keeper of a life that exists only in my mind.

I talk about him to remember & honour

who he was and his impact in this world.

I will always talk about him because for 

me, he's still here, weaved into 

everything I am and do."

Yes, yes, yes! And if you happen to be a non-griever reading this: if you are uncomfortable when we grievers bring up our person who died, please know that we are honoring that person and our relationship with them. Please make space for this, even if makes you a little uncomforable.

On grieving her mom and brother: "I have definitely seen the highest of the highs and the lowest of the lows. You don't know how strong you are until you are placed in that kind of moment."

– Jennifer Hudson
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